I believe just as many others do that positive thinking and written goals are something that can propel you too much greater success than just hoping for good to come. One thing that should be mentioned too more often though is the role of negative thinking in our lives.
Negative thinking to me is just looking at the bad side of a situation. Things like “If I run I might hurt myself” or “I don’t want to give up chocolate forever” or “What’s the point, I will probably fail anyway” these are very dis-empowering thoughts and they will stop you from achieving success. Really all negative thinking is is a pattern of thought. Since it is a pattern you can change it and not have it as much in your life anymore.
We have all had tough times and bad thoughts roll through our head but if you think about a time when you were excited and looked forward to a situation compared to a time where you were scared, worried and though you might fail you can remember I am sure the lack of strength and the lack of commitment that you felt. There is nothing worse and what a terrible way to go through life scared of what is coming up looking with fear at the opportunities that await.
The other problem with using negativity is that it just does not open many doors for you for new experiences. If you look around and see someone that is always negative, do they get accepted as easily socially as others? Do they seem to get the chance to try new things? I feel very strongly, some would probably say too strongly that to be positive and excited will change the way that you feel and the way that others interact with you.
So what do you do about negative thoughts and the terrible things that they inflict on you? First of all you can resolve to wake up in the morning excited about what is coming. Know that there is excitement in life and it is up to you to search it out and have some of it.
Next there was an idea I picked up from Tony Robbins years back and it was based on some kind of a book. See how many days in a row you can go without having a negative thought. This is very difficult since we all get caught behind bad drivers, have grouchy sales people in stores and angry coworkers but in trying to have no negative thoughts you will really see a reflection of what negativity does to people and what you are missing out on by not falling into that pattern.
So now I have told you about two of the secrets of a better life. I have mentioned lots of times about how being positive is great and helpful but now you can also know why it is a good thing to avoid negativity as well.
It sure must be nice to be able to be positive all the time. I’m not, never have been, nor never will be. When you grow up with negativity, and are surrounded by it, it is hard not to give in to. It is a physical aliment, sometimes called depression. Maybe you’ve heard of it. It’s far easier for me to be negative, than positive, because when something does go wrong, it was not unexpected. By saying being negative is bad, you are reinforcing negative thoughts about myself. Like making a puppy feel bad for peeing on the floor when it doesn’t know any better.
I think your title is too negative! 🙂
But I joke! Being positive is not just the end result, but a means to an end: It’s just EASIER to be positive and you’ll feel better doing it. We get caught up in the now, and it’s easy to pick up on negativity (don’t watch TV or read the paper or check out blogs!), but just as it’s easier to smile than to frown (less work involved), it’s simply easier to be positive.
It requires zero energy and it might just give you some!
Being negative IS bad. There are now more than two decades of science backing that up.
In fact, among elite athletes, having a pessimistic outlook on life impacts how you do after an adversity, compared to an athlete who is an optimist. This means that if all you do is put two different people – one an optimist and one a pessimist – in the same situation, after they both faced the same setback, the optimist will get a better time the second time around, and the pessimist will perform worse. This famous experiment was done with swimmers from the U.S. Olympic program, including Matt Biondi. More about the experiment, and what we can do, is chronicled in the book “Learned Optimism: How to Change Your Mind and Your Life” by noted University of Pennsylvania psychologist Martin Seligman.
While developing an optimistic perspective helps lead to substantial improvement, research shows that just getting the negative thoughts out of the way, even temporarily, can help improve critical thinking, creativity, and even how you respond to challenges. This simple skillset is even part of the advanced resilience training that the army and corporations are now using. The book “Resilience Factor” by Drs Martin Seligman and Karen Reivich covers this too.
On http://www.happier.com, we have tools to help people stop being negative. The tools are things you can do online and they help develop optimism even among pessimists and reduce negativity. We’ve developed them by working with leading psychologists. One thing that’s important to point out is that the science shows us we have to be realistic optimists for this to make a difference. This means that just pretending everything is great and nothing will go wrong won’t help, and in fact, it isn’t a healthy perspective.
Being less negative is healthy, helps us meet goals, and is backed by science. But it’s hard work!
We couldn’t agree more with this post. We preach to our clients the importance of maintaining a positive outlook and surrounding yourself with positive influences. Far too often, people don’t realize the true effects of negativity and how deeply it interacts with their ability to focus and be successful. Great post. Very important topic.